Archive for the ‘Sarcasm’ Category

The Science Of Bad Movies

In Entertainment, Reviews, Sarcasm on September 22, 2008 at 5:24 am

Remember this review?

Well I just watched a similarly terrible movie on Saturday, titled: Babylon A.D., starring Vin Diesel.

Okay, by now you’re probably saying: “That’s what you get watching a Vin Diesel movie.”  Truthfully, the global warming made me watch.  Jakarta was literally the melting pot (read: everything could melt) due to the heat that day, and I needed somewhere cool to go.  What could be cooler than the XXI cinemas air conditioners?  Hence the movie, because we (me and le boyfriend) missed Hellboy.  The nearest movie was Babylon A.D. and we proceeded, ignoring the huge possibility of the movie being awful as we saw Vin Diesel on the poster.  As long as we can find A.C, we’ll watch A.D.


I’m not gonna rewrite the plot here.  I’m just gonna type my observation of how to avoid or to make the most out of watching bad movies after several experiences, including especially the most traumatic one: Sunshine.

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Half Full

In Sarcasm on August 21, 2008 at 11:01 pm

I just don’t get pessimistic people.

It’s like, they don’t get enough drama provided by daily life that they think they need to add some more by whining about how cruel life is treating them and how unfair the world is and how they are NOT able to do many many stuff that are actually DOABLE.

“Why won’t you do that?”
“Nah, that’s not me.  I can’t possibly do that”

What is it with CAN’T?  I am so fucking tempted to ask “Is it ‘CAN’T’ or is it WON’T?”

Why are there always people with half empty glasses, and why are they keep bothering people whose glasses are half full?  And why is it that failure is seen to be the end of the world?  Failure is not the end of the world, it’s a lesson.

Just some stuff I need to get off my chest -and probably slap some people HARD, whatever I don’t care, I’m not Oprah-:

Life is not all the way pretty, but if you can’t find any single positive side of such “mess”, then maybe you don’t deserve to live.  And you might actually be the crap, the worthless peace of meat you think you are.


Die, Copycats, Die

In Sarcasm on July 31, 2008 at 4:12 am

…and I hope you all rot in limbo as hell is far too easy for the likes of you.

Today’s Magic Words

In Sarcasm on April 14, 2008 at 8:09 pm

Never 100% believe anything you read, see or hear.

Wait. I thought that was YOUR line.



“Ekselen” for “Excellent”?

In Daily Annoyance, Eyesore, Image Post, Sarcasm on March 10, 2008 at 11:37 pm

I don’t understand the ‘Indonesianized’ English.  To me, personally, if one wants to write in English then one should write it properly.  And if one does not know what an English word means in Bahasa Indonesia, then one should buy oneself um… what’s that thing called again? Ah yes… a DICTIONARY.

Ekselen My Ass

Why can’t they just say ‘Menuju Kinerja Sempurna” and spare the embarrassment? Tsk.

Attention LIA, ILP, EEP, EF!  The folks at Jasa Marga need an intensive training and they need it FAST.

Save The Plastic Bags, Save The World!

In Image Post, Sarcasm on January 7, 2008 at 2:33 am

As posted previously in my Indonesian blog.

I am no environmentalist. Dude, I still smoke and drive a gasoline-powered car. But I’m trying to cut down paper use. Trying to not litter. And lately I’ve been trying to save electricity with any means possible. I know about the global warming although I really think the campaigns are overrated. And it’s so overrated that some geniuses at our local Carrefour Hypermarket decided to help save the environment without really knowing what to do. Why do I say so? Well they issued these so-called special edition shopping bags, as seen in its ITC Permata Hijau branch.

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The World Is MAD

In Daily Annoyance, Eyesore, Sarcasm, Ultimate Sarcasm on December 13, 2007 at 12:22 pm

I never liked it when I actually watch or read serious news.  It made me sad, depressed and disgusted ever so often.

It was quite a bummer to see Basuki, the comedian, died so suddenly out of a heart-attack.

But then I was faced with the most offending news ever in RCTI’s Bulletin Siang.  The handsome anchor delivered a news about a container, stuck at Tanjung Priok, filled with USED CONDOMS from Germany.  Not only that, they actually filmed what’s inside the container.  It made me sick.  How can they release such news ON LUNCHTIME?  To add the nausea factor, they even portrayed facts about how these used condoms are used for ladies’ hairbands.  Tsk.  RCTI.  Thank you for getting rid of my appetite.  You suck.

Aside from the icky news,

I found it really disgusting that what we wear on our HEADS were once used as contraceptive tools.  God knows where they’ve been and how.

It’s funny how a drunken one night stand can end up making you look pretty.

I wouldn’t be surprised if one of these days God get bored with human beings’ antics and decides to pull the plug so the earth stops spinning and doomsday will finally arrive.

The world is getting ridiculously mad.

Amazingly Appalling

In My Amazing Race Asia Addiction, Sarcasm on November 2, 2007 at 1:37 am

So it’s that time of the year again, when I wouldn’t be able to be disturbed on Thursday nights.  I’d be glued to my TV set to watch the contestants of The Amazing Race Asia get their gears on and race around the world, while drooling over the ever so handsome Allan Wu.

Or so I thought.

I just finished watching the “Racers Revealed” premier episode of the Amazing Race Asia season two and felt outrageously appalled seeing the contestants lineup.  Why?  Let’s see.

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This Movie Suck Ass.

In Entertainment, Eyesore, Reviews, Sarcasm, Ultimate Sarcasm on October 18, 2007 at 3:21 pm

This confirms my hatred towards the wanting-to-be-sophisticated-but-fails “festival” movie.  I’m not much of a film festival goer, because the experience was almost always traumatizing.  The only times I was actually entertained in a movie festival was when I went to see Amelie and The Royal Tannenbaums.  The latter is probably because I have an undying love of Ben Stiller’s comedy aside from Rob Schneider’s and Adam Sandler’s.  To me, movies are supposed to be entertaining and not depressing.

Well I’m a Hollywood comedy freak so I know there will be a lot of people who are going to really disagree with me, maybe even say that I’m just plain shallow.  Ah who cares, I’m still gonna trash this movie anyway.  And yes, with bloody spoilers, of course.

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On Being Pathetic

In Daily Annoyance, Sarcasm, Ultimate Sarcasm on October 16, 2007 at 4:44 pm

Right.  While we are being somewhat enraged thus awaken the bitchiness that had been kept nicely for quite some time now, I want to say something else.

So aside from this blog which I classify as my English trash bin for my thoughts, I also host another blog in Indonesian which… is not much of a difference, really.  And I’ve written cynical observations about how people behave when they’re infatuated (“in love” would be so overrated) with other people.  Most of my Indonesian blog buddies read it and laugh as I intended them to… but I found (pardon my language here) very sad and pathetic searches from Google in my dashboard, that people actually look for tips on flirting and how to interpret signals from their objects of desire.

Seriously, boys and girls!

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