Analyzing? Agh!

In Silly Posts, Weird Philosophy on February 20, 2007 at 1:40 am

An expected phone call taught me something tonight.

If you win some, you’re bound to lose some.

And the phone call taught me another thing: always deliver the bad news first before revealing the good news. I never fully understand why people do this, because to me news is just news be it good or bad. But tonight it hit me. The reason why they always put the good behind the back is somewhat to cushion the blow. And even if this fact have been recited to me on and on again in my life, I’ve never really understand how it feels to be ‘cushioned’ after being ‘blown’.

Don’t worry, now I get it.

I’m not exactly doing my victory dance or anything. I, in fact, am still in the process of digesting what I just heard about 20 minutes ago. My mind is still telling me that the phone call did not just happen and the person who spoke to me did not say the words I’ve been longing to hear all these times. It is weird how something that’s supposed to be a ‘good’ news suddenly popped out as a ‘bad’ news. Even now I’m still rewinding the conversation inside my head, trying my hardest to differ the ‘good’ from the ‘bad’.

Golly, now that I’ve written this down, I get more and more confused. Did I just hear a good news or a bad news? And was the better part of the news considered ‘good’ or ‘great’?

Mind this post, people. I’m just mumbling.

But what makes me mumble?

I’m analyzing. And there isn’t anything harder in the world than to analyze yourself. It’s fucking hard to be analytical when you’re not even sure what you are analyzing and why you do it in the first place.

Okay, back to the winning and the losing.

Wait. Did I just win or did I just lose? Because if I had actually won something, then I’d be jumping up and down in joy. But if I had lost, I’d be just down and crying my heart out.

Right now, half of me is feeling like jumping up and down joyfully while the other half is not down and crying but more to the bewildered part.

Life gets more complicated when you get older, and I think that is why people dread having their birthdays celebrated. Luckily I’m not those people, although I know the level of complications is always a tad higher for me.

Ah what am I really trying to say here?

I win some, I lose some. Or am I really winning some and losing some?

Ugh. I’m not sure yet. AAAAAGGGHH.

Baby, I’m gonna call you in a minute and tell you all about this. Help me decide how to feel. I trust your judgement. I love you!

  1. Aaagh! Now I’m lost analyzing your analysis… 🙂

    By the way, there’s no such thing as bad news. There’s only news. That’s what I learned from an instructor in presentation.

  2. baby, i want to see your victory dance. you’ve never showed me that before.

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